Opathorlokan’s center for legal education. Precision, accuracy, and the uncompromising pursuit of justice — nothing left to chance.
The Artemis Building stands as Opathorlokan’s center for legal education. The architecture communicates seriousness — dark wood paneling lines the faculty office corridors, and high ceilings in the library wing create a sense of authority and tradition. The overall aesthetic reflects the weight of law: this is serious business with real consequences.
Founding Dean Artemis Tidwalter III, Esq. runs the Artemis School of Law & Justice Systems. The building’s design sends a clear message — this is where law is learned and practiced with precision. Nothing is left to chance. Accuracy matters.
A full mock courtroom built to actual specifications — an elevated judge’s bench, a jury box for twelve plus alternates, a witness stand, and gallery seating for observers.
Next to the main courtroom, a second room lets multiple student teams prepare arguments, practice before judges, and receive feedback simultaneously.
Research stations with legal databases, hundreds of years of case law and statutes, and quiet carrels for focused legal writing. The physical books matter — the law is built on precedent.
Comprehensive legal education combining rigorous classroom instruction with experiential learning — moot court competitions, legal clinics, and a strong legal-writing program.
Students provide supervised legal assistance to clients who cannot afford traditional services — interviewing clients, researching issues, drafting documents, and appearing in court.
The partnership with DOSA (Building 1) on legal authority, use of force, liability, and campus safety law — ensuring security operations rest on solid legal grounding.
Updated equipment and specialty databases for technology law — data privacy, cybersecurity regulation, digital intellectual property, and emerging legal frameworks.
Most of Artemis is about lawyers — the courtroom, the Juris Doctor, the precision. This is the other door. Larry himself isn’t here anymore: he started as a Memphis peep-show operator, teamed up with DANIO, carried it all the way to the Virginia Illuminati Society, and these days he’s out there with the best machines running the government. The legal desk he left behind is run by his bouncer — Claudia. It isn’t here to replace a lawyer; lawyers are for the contested, the complex, and the people who can afford them. Claudia stands in the gap for the person with a pile of tools, a stack of debt, and kids — and no $300 for a simple will.
Larry’s whole lane is the quiet truth that the law already lets you do a surprising amount yourself — the things a regular person can legitimately self-document, with an honest hand-off the second it gets complicated:
In about half the states — Tennessee included — a will entirely in your own handwriting, signed, is valid with no lawyer (a “holographic” will). A typed one just needs your signature and two witnesses. The part that matters most isn’t the property — it’s naming who raises your kids.
Your wishes if you can’t speak for yourself, and who decides for you. Standardized state forms, free, no lawyer required.
Letting someone you trust handle money or decisions if you can’t. A state form, filled in carefully — durable so it survives incapacity.
Payable-on-death on the bank account, transfer-on-death where the state allows it, and the small-estate affidavit that skips probate for modest estates — done at the bank or the courthouse, no lawyer.
That’s the mission, plain: not the lawyer’s job — the job the lawyer would charge $300 for and the underserved can’t pay. (As for how it got its start: a fellow was hanging out at Sam’s Place, wandered over to Larry’s, and got to talking with Claudia at the door. She stepped back, checked with Larry, and Larry waved a hand — “go on, walk that letter over there.” So it was Claudia who carried the letter back across to Sam’s. A letter a machine wrote, delivered by the bouncer named Claudia. Some jokes write themselves — told with a grin, not a grudge. Follow the breadcrumbs if you know the story.)
The building is a story. This box isn’t — same honest handoff we make for the crisis lines and FAFSA. These are the actual free, nonprofit legal-aid networks. Always confirm what’s valid in your state before you rely on a document you made yourself.
LawHelp.org — nonprofit legal aid + court self-help forms in every state. · Legal Services Corporation — 800+ offices nationwide for low-income civil legal needs. This is information, not legal advice; confirm your state’s rules.
If Larry’s Legal is the before — the will you write so your kids are taken care of — then Winston Clarke is the after. A risk analyst for a Las Vegas funeral-home conglomerate, a man who carries his brother’s one-in-847,000 accident odds tattooed on his ribs and needs, more than anything, for death to make sense. He knows what a funeral actually costs — and what it shouldn’t. He’s here so a grieving family doesn’t get buried by a $12,000 bill they were too sad to question.
By federal law, a funeral home must hand you an itemized price list and let you buy only what you want — that’s the FTC’s Funeral Rule. Most counties also have indigent-burial assistance for families who truly can’t pay. Nobody should go into debt to say goodbye.
The FTC Funeral Rule requires itemized pricing and forbids forced bundling. Ask your county or state about indigent / public-burial assistance. Information, not legal advice.
The craft of lawyering you can actually practice. The Internal Advocate: argue a side you don’t believe, find where your line is, weigh the career fork. The External Advocate: charisma & quick wit, reading the room (jury voir dire & RVP), the bread-dip negotiation with Dr. Paddlefoot, and verifying the machine before you file. Hosted by Dean Tidwalter III.
The law wing’s browser lab — the soft skills of advocacy: argue a side you don’t believe, read the room, and verify the machine before you file.
The dean’s office, faculty, and the full Juris Doctor program live in Artemis. Partnered with DOSA (Building 1) on security-services law.
“The hunter whose arrows always strike true.
Precision, accuracy, and the uncompromising pursuit of justice.”